Rabbi Simcha Cohen
A husband and wife who run a home together understand intellectually that their goal is to achieve harmony in the way their family functions.
Each of them is interested in, and wants to act in, the greatest possible accord with the other spouse. Yet the very fact that they are a man and a woman means they possess different qualities, which are fundamentally positive and necessary for the family to function properly.
The spouses would be wise to examine themselves in light of everything said above, try to correct their shortcomings, and accustom themselves to the right actions in order to achieve true partnership within the family.
It is important for both husband and wife to understand fully that the differences in their behavior do not arise from ill will, but from differences in the psychological makeup of men and women.
This will help a woman who feels that her husband is treating her improperly to accept that there is nothing personal in it.
She will understand that the problem that has arisen lies not in the bond between them, but in male psychology, and that a similar relationship would have developed with any other man had she married him.
The husband, in turn, should realize that his psychological makeup lacks a sense of partnership, and that the small measure of partnership he does possess needs to be developed and strengthened to achieve a good relationship. He should understand that the discomfort he feels about the differences in his wife's personality is also felt by her: she, too, suffers, and suffers greatly, because he does not become her partner in everything that takes place in the home and family.