Rebbetzin Leah Gans
One day, my husband was riding a bus, lost in thought. Someone with long hair and an earring sat down beside him. Without taking a closer look, my husband got up—it is not proper to sit next to a woman who is not your wife! His seatmate (!) also got up and said, «Did you think I was a woman? No, I'm a man; you can sit back down». When my husband sat down again, the man asked, «Listen, why do you act this way? A woman's beauty was created to be admired! Why do you run away, then?»
That is a very good question: why do we hide beauty? Why don't we display it publicly? Where does beauty belong? And, in general, is it something positive or negative?
What is the right attitude toward women's beauty?
Of course, beauty is a very good, positive thing. Everything the Almighty created is necessary and good. The only question is how, where, and to what extent beauty should be expressed—at home and outside.
In our sources, we see that a certain place is given to personal care. It is written that throughout the forty years in the wilderness, a certain ingredient fell along with the manna; it was ground and used to make various cosmetics and perfumes.
This fact is less well known, but cosmetics accompanied the women throughout all 40 years of wandering in the wilderness!
When the Jews returned from the Babylonian exile and began rebuilding their lives in the Land of Israel, one of Ezra's ordinances was that peddlers should travel around the country selling cosmetics and jewelry! This was done so that a husband would not neglect his wife. Life was very hard for the newcomers; the women worked a great deal (including in the sun), and their skin became rough. Jewish women could not be allowed to become unattractive to their husbands—this was an issue at the national level.
It is known that Abba Hilkiah's wife would step outside the doorway to greet him in the evening, beautifully dressed and wearing makeup. Why? So that he would not look at other women.
All these examples show us that beauty is something very necessary and positive. The whole question is how to use it.
to be continuedPrepared by Mrs. Zissi Skarzhinskaya