The prohibition against causing hurt and suffering (ona’at devarim)
11. When a shopkeeper does not have the product a customer needs, he may not send customers to another shop if he knows that it, too, is currently out of stock. (Sometimes a shopkeeper feels uncomfortable leaving customers without an answer, or he cannot cope with a large number of people, so he may mistakenly consider this a perfectly acceptable solution).
12. Calling a taxi, ordering a pizza, or requesting other services just for amusement also violates the prohibition against “causing hurt.” In addition, when there is a fixed charge for a home visit, the “prankster” must also compensate for the loss caused. When it comes to calls to the police, fire service, or ambulance service, an unnecessary call may pose a direct threat to someone’s life. Sometimes an emergency vehicle needs to be dispatched elsewhere, where people are actually waiting for it, and if it is responding to a “prankster’s” call at that moment, a seriously ill person may not receive emergency care in time.
Such pranks are also forbidden when directed at ordinary people (for example, calling to tell someone that they have won a large sum of money, and the like), because they waste people’s time and cause them distress.
**** Summer vacation had begun. Chana was playing with her friends at the playground. Another large family arrived there. It was clear that they did not live in the neighborhood. One of them approached Chana and asked where they could buy infant formula. Chana immediately remembered an elderly woman who had repeatedly complained to her parents about the noise in the courtyard and about her behavior.
“There’s a woman here who runs a gemach[1] for people who need that kind of formula,” Chana said. Then she added that the woman was very elderly and afraid of burglars and tax officials, so they would have to explain who they really were.
The people went to the elderly woman, while Chana and her friends ran home to watch what would happen. The girls watched and doubled over with laughter: the family tried to convince the neighbor that she had nothing to fear and that they simply needed infant formula, while she shouted that she knew nothing about it and would call the police if they did not leave her alone.
Chana violated three commandments: “Do not take revenge,” “Love your neighbor,” and the prohibition of ona’ah. As for her friends, they should have tried to stop Chana and, in any event, should not have taken part in such an act.
13. If a group of people has been asked a question, and we are not sure whether one of those present knows the answer, it is forbidden to turn to that person and say, “Well, what do you say?”
14. Students are forbidden to ask a question that could embarrass their teacher.
15. If someone mistakenly asks an inappropriate or even foolish question, one should not immediately look at them. It will be less distressing and embarrassing for them if people do not give them mocking looks.
Mrs. Sosnova was talking to a friend at her niece’s wedding. Suddenly, the expensive glass she was holding slipped from her hands and shattered. Many of those present immediately turned and looked at her. She caught their glances and felt terribly embarrassed and awkward. Her only comfort was that the most respected rabbis’ wives, seated at the head table, did not even look up and continued with what they were doing.
In fact, the women seated at the head table had also heard the glass shatter, but decided it would be better not to look in that direction.
[1] An abbreviation for “gemilut chasadim”—acts of selfless kindness. The term commonly refers to private funds that offer interest-free loans, lend urgently needed household items, or provide other services free of charge. In telephone directories serving areas populated by Torah-observant Jews, entire pages are filled with listings for such gemachs—for example, gemachs for chairs, baby bottles, medicines, and even a shelter for children who have lost their way.