Immediately after immersion, the next phase begins, ending with the onset of the next menstrual period. This is the time when the uterine lining built up during the “seven clean days” “lives.” At this stage, what has been created is alive. A woman who has immersed in a mikveh is ritually pure.
Just as autumn gives us the pleasure of enjoying the beauty of plants that blossomed and grew in summer, and the taste of fruit that ripened in summer, so the period of ritual purity gives spouses the joy of physical intimacy.
In both cases, the patient wait proved worthwhile. It was worth waiting in “spring” to experience the full depth of feeling in “autumn.”
Everyone wants happiness in marriage. And every couple understands that happiness cannot be achieved without a deep emotional bond with one's partner.
Achieving such a bond is no easy task. Moreover, even once such a bond has been established, its endurance over time is by no means something to take for granted. Over the years, married life can lose its novelty and become routine, causing the bond between husband and wife to weaken. It is no secret that the institution of marriage is on very shaky ground throughout the world today. Sadly, all of us have friends, acquaintances, or relatives who are unhappy in their marriages or have experienced the pain of a family breaking apart.
Family life is complex, and we cannot claim to possess a panacea, a universal remedy for every problem that may arise within it.
But we can certainly say that observing the laws of family purity generally reduces tension in marriage and brings a sense of renewal to the relationship between spouses, sustaining their joy and love, which, as we know, tend to fade amid the monotony of everyday life. By abstaining from physical intimacy during niddah and returning to it after a break, husband and wife feel their love for each other renewed. Alternating between abstinence and closeness strengthens both mutual understanding and respect, as well as the feeling of love and emotional connection between spouses[1].
The Period of Ritual Purity
After immersion in a kosher mikveh, all expressions of closeness, including intimate relations, are once again permitted to the couple. This period generally lasts two weeks, until the onset of the next menstrual period.
Calculating the Timing of the Next Menstrual Period
We know that a woman becomes a niddah even if the discharge of blood from the uterus was minimal. It may happen that she does not even notice it. Thus, a couple may sometimes be unaware that the niddah period has already begun and unintentionally violate the prohibition on intimacy. It follows that the approximate time when the next menstrual period will begin must be calculated.
In most women (apart from those who are pregnant, breastfeeding, or of menopausal age), menstruation recurs at intervals of about 28-32 days, that is, more or less regularly. Some women have a strictly regular cycle, for example, recurring every 32 days. For some women, particular pains signal the onset of menstruation after a precisely fixed interval (a few minutes for some, a few hours for others). But this is rare among women today; for the most part, as we have already said, their cycles are irregular. There are separate laws for calculating “regular” and “irregular” cycles.
Marital relations are forbidden on the night or day when, according to the calculations, menstruation is expected.
The woman checks whether her period has begun. If that day or night has passed and the examination was “clean,” intimate relations are once again permitted until menstruation begins.
[1] Talmud, tractate Niddah, 31b. This topic is discussed in greater detail in chapters 6 (Four Stages of Building Love) and 14 (True Love).